such is life.

i'm in such a daze today - i think i'm preparing myself for an allergy attack, but hope not. it's that time of the season {change in the wind} again, blah! that and i find myself just thinking too much lately. i've been having bad dreams too....sad. sad dreams is more like it. the first one {and i haven't told him this, a little weird!} was my little brother called crying on the phone to me {little as in he's 25 yrs old} saying he had made some bad choices with selling drugs and someone was in a high speed chase in a car after him and then the phone went dead. scary! Tim called him that day and i was in the car on bluetooth, so i know he is OK, but that dream was just weird. then last night i had a dream i got fired. and they were trying to make up excuses and finally came up with i am not 'good enough' for this job {ha!}. so i was pretty upset. so strange! i think i'm just worried about how life is going to go in the next few years and worried about this economy. a few people at work have been laid off. but so far, they've made it seem like my job is not on the fritz. so i shouldn't worry this way. {easier SAID than done}

i need to get back into reading my Bible and studying...i realize that whenever i am doing THAT, i am not as worried about things. and i just realized that my time isn't like God's timing. what i think is a minute could actually be days according to HIS plans. :) what i think is months away could be longer in His eyes. i just need to rely on the fact that our lives {my family's} are in tune with His will, not ours. sometimes that is hard, being the control freak i tend to be. i have one thought or plan in mind and someone else comes by and that plan totally changes things...well, maybe my plan isn't the way it's supposed to be. but sometimes that is hard for me to accept. i guess i'm just a creature of habit and i've even read the book "Who Moved My Cheese". LOL! ;)

i guess if you could just please pray for me and this upcoming year. i feel like there are a lot of big changes coming our way and i just need some positive reinforcements out there! GOOD changes are coming up soon! i am so excited, but anxious and a little guarded with my surroundings.

we have some really exciting things going on and we just celebrated out baby girl's 7 year birthday party! it was incredible! she had a Spongebob Luau pool party and we had alot of people over at our place celebrating with us. then on sunday we went to Disneyland all day! our friends from Sacramento came down to spend the weekend with us also. lots of fun it was! there are pictures on my facebook if you are interested. ;) we have some exciting trips coming up in Sept and our Halloween party in Oct, then of course there's always something going on in Nov and Dec! the rest of 2009 is going to fly by.....

thanks for reading and thanks for your thoughts and prayers. ♥