so lately i've been feeling really emotional and at first i was wondering if something was wrong with me {no...i am not pregnant, nor do i want to be pregnant - had to get that out there right away}. then i sat back and realized that i have a lot going on. not necessarily with my own life...which, granted i do have a lot going on there with work and Haylee and gatherings and planning things for the future and laundry and laundry and laundry and getting things lined up for the Fall of '08 with school and then there's dinner and spending time with Tim and a bunch of other boring random things you probably don't even care about. :) then there are feelings i'm struggling with once again in my life with relationships {no, not struggling with relationships, just feelings toward some relationships or lack there of in my life. no, not with Tim}. LOL. i just want to set those records straight before someone decides to jump to any conclusions. ;)
on top of that my really good friend is going through something right now. i know she wouldn't want me blogging about it, but it has affected me a GREAT deal. mostly because i think how much a like we can be and it scares me that she's even in that position. i really don't think it is her own doing, but still. life can drastically change in an instant and that freaks me out a lot. i've been emotionally distraught for my friend and it really bothers me that i cannot do anything to fix her issue or heal her pain for her. i see her hurting so much and i just want to do something about it and fix it. {the mother in me?} i know it will take time for her and i am learning how to just make myself accessible for her, that is the best i can offer at this point. and praying. i'm constantly thinking of her and when i do, i muster up a prayer for her because my thought about her can do nothing without some sort of powerful force behind it. :) just please pray for my friend. God knows who she is. thank you.
i think with Haylee getting older that adds to my emotionality. it's not easy watching her, my only child, no longer needing her Mommy. it's painful at times, but i know i have to let her go because if i don't it won't be good in the long run. ;) i'm really trying to enjoy every bit of her while i can. i hang out with her until she just wears my ears off {if you know Haylee you know she talks literally NON-STOP, nonstop!}...and then i have her do projects on her own, LOL. she's such an awesome little person, i love her with all my being. i never knew i could love someone so much. she really adds flair to my life. :)) *see me beaming?*
then this damn dog. i was going to blog about how i feel so sorry for Miley, she got spayed yesterday and she's been so groggy due to sedation. but about 5 minutes ago, without warning she takes a big runny crap on my floor...i know she is probably still sedated, ugh...but geez. i may be a Mom, but my stomach is DEFINITELY not meant for anything that gross. i gagged and threw up through the whole cleaning process. oy vei! not my thing! thank God Haylee has only thrown up ONCE really bad that i've had to clean up...God knew i couldn't handle that...ha ha!
so on the happy & brighter side, check this out...so awhile back i blogged about a Joyce Meyer book that i purchased online and i was so stoked about. "How to Succeed at Being Yourself". well, i thought i would love it and at the time i tried to read it numerous times and it just connect with me. so i put it away. we had this yard sale and i found ALL kinds of things i forgot i had! including this book. i read the blurb again and thought, wow, i can relate to that...so i started reading it again 2 nights or so ago and wow....God is truly amazing to me. EVERYTHING i have started reading about i am shaking my head YES to. it's really touched me so far and i'm excited to see what's in store for me. i have decided to get back into reading my books...i love it and i'm so MOVED by words and lately found myself moved to tears by a lot of different things. my heart is softening up again, i can tell a change in my attitude too. good timing for my friend that really needs me. God sure knows what He's doing all along...
the fair
my weekend has been great! on saturday i woke up EARLY for the neighborhood yard sale and boy was it CRAZY. our neighbors were right! i didn't set up until 6:30am, but when i opened my garage, people swarmed INSIDE before i could get things set up. it was loco.my sister & brother in law and my mom in law came over too to help out and sell some of their junk. :) we all took turns walking around looking for treasures...every other house was having a sale, and it was probably 4 or 5 blocks of sales! a lot of people were cooking... Nicki & i didn't buy anything but FOOD, lol! chorizo & potato burritos...terryaki beef sticks...lemonade....eggrolls. ha ha! i did end up buying some things, but the stuff i bought was brand new. ;) i bought a hand made necklace & earring set - it is in my fav aqua color and sterling silver, very pretty. i also bought some boutique chinese style flats...they are really cute. for $3 it wasn't a bad deal at all! Haylee bought a webkins bull dog (very cute!) and a tiger stuffed animal that she really didn't need...but she and her cousin Lilly had fun. they were selling arrowhead waters out of our cooler for .50 each. they were VERY good little sales girls! we sold 2 cases of water! Tim & I ended up collecting just about $250 by the end of the sale. :) pretty good!
after that we cleaned up & headed to the fair. i am downloading A LOT more pictures, i will prob put them in an album on facebook if you want to go see them. i will put the link on here later for those of you who do not have facebook. ;) it's just easier that way! i only have to do one small step verses putting them onto photobucket and uploading them to blogger. :) i took over 100 pics of the fair, this year's theme was...."say cheese!". there were cameras and cut outs to take pics EVERY WHERE!!!!! omg i was in heaven! i went crazy. it was a lot of fun. we saw the live stock...which i actually love, lol! we ate {greasy} fair food! we watching the Peking Acrobats and a hypnotist...that was the coolest {and scariest!} show i have ever seen! we shopped, got Haylee a small surf board with her name on it from a shop. we met up with our friend Todd & Ann and walked around. it was a lot of fun. Haylee & Tim rode an ELEPHANT! :) yes...you must go see those pics! they are great!
today i've been feeling really icky. i think my allergies are really flaring up again. :( we went to church this morning...although i wasn't feeling it, i'm really glad i went. i always feel so good when i go and i almost ALWAYS tear up...i don't know i guess the Holy Spirit just speaks to me on so many levels and i just love the worship! i think because i've been outdoors all weekend, so my allergies are acting up. i have a bit of a sinus head ache and didn't sleep well last night. i took a 2 HOUR nap this afternoon. yup...i'm not feeling good! pray it goes away fast...usually it lasts about 2 weeks or so for me when the seasons change. ugh!
have a wonderful week everyone...
plans?
so i am just going to give you fair warning here...i probably won't be online so much this weekend. :) i am really hoping to get some good pictures...but knowing what i NOW know about cameras, my little old point-and-shoot just isn't as satisfying as i wish it would be. have i mentioned that i really really REALLY want a DSLR? i have it narrowed down to two...if you have one, PUHLEASE give me advice. i have it narrowed down to the Nikon DSLR 6.1 MP with 18-55 lens (i could always buy a new lens since this one is REALLY cheap...cheap as in $500...which is not really all that cheap at all) OR the Cannon EOS DSLR which is running $100 more than the Nikon. {{sigh}} i wish i just had that money laying around for leisure. ;)
i guess i will have to wait until CHRISTMAS. gosh. seems too far away. anyone know anyone selling one of these brands? ;) you just don't know how happy i would be. this is my life. day dreaming about a camera. {how sad, i know i know}
anyhoo...tomorrow i am waking up at 5am. no that's not a typo. 5am, you read it correctly. my neighborhood is having a community yard sale. it's like 6 years running now, isn't that crazy? want to hear something even MORE crazy is when i got home around 5:30pm tonight people were already putting stuff out to sell in their driveways! what?! i know, these people are gung-ho, totally. it took me 3 HOURS to get all of my crap downstairs, to the garage and labeled with price tags. i am such a perfectionist though. i kicked Tim out of the garage, poor guy, LOL. get out...it's my world. :) i'm the organizer. he's used to it. hopefully we make some moola from this, that would be nice. we have a lot of junk. hopefully others will see some use out of it and buy buy buy! so yes, 5am. i will have everything out by 6:30am hopefully and the yard sales start at 7am. but we were talking to the neighbor and he said it is garage sale MADNESS...like nothing we've ever seen before. hey, i just might have to whip out the camera if it gets too silly. who knows. ha ha! yikes, i'm a little worried, hopefully no one is too pushy. i really don't like having yard sales. who knows, maybe i will find something to buy from my neighbors. :)
other than that - we are planning on going to the OC fair this weekend. i can't believe it's almost here and gone! we usually go to it at the beginning but we've just been busy. it seems for our family the summers are CRAZY busy. we have SO many birthdays and family gatherings and parties and this year we had a vacation {hopefully we continue that as a tradition, next year hopefully it's Hawaii! i wouldn't mind NYC again though!}.
Haylee has an agent audition in the morning...so pray for her on that. we have to get her going with that. she starts soccer next month and then she will start 1st grade in Sept! yikes. i don't even want to think that i'm a mom to a {almost} 6 year old/1st grader! where in the world has the time gone? they grow up so fast, you can't blink, you'll miss it. i always thought that was stupid when people said that, but i truly can understand it now. it's so bittersweet for me. i could tear up just thinking about it. so i won't. :)
i think that's it friends! i hope you all have a fantabulous weekend!! people comment, email or facebook me {or text OR better yet CALL me} to let me know what's going on in your lives. i love to hear from you all. i don't even know who reads my blog anymore...unless you comment. sometimes some of you do and i'm thinking, WOW...really? you read my blog? :) i feel honored. ;) love you all! xoxo
i guess i will have to wait until CHRISTMAS. gosh. seems too far away. anyone know anyone selling one of these brands? ;) you just don't know how happy i would be. this is my life. day dreaming about a camera. {how sad, i know i know}
anyhoo...tomorrow i am waking up at 5am. no that's not a typo. 5am, you read it correctly. my neighborhood is having a community yard sale. it's like 6 years running now, isn't that crazy? want to hear something even MORE crazy is when i got home around 5:30pm tonight people were already putting stuff out to sell in their driveways! what?! i know, these people are gung-ho, totally. it took me 3 HOURS to get all of my crap downstairs, to the garage and labeled with price tags. i am such a perfectionist though. i kicked Tim out of the garage, poor guy, LOL. get out...it's my world. :) i'm the organizer. he's used to it. hopefully we make some moola from this, that would be nice. we have a lot of junk. hopefully others will see some use out of it and buy buy buy! so yes, 5am. i will have everything out by 6:30am hopefully and the yard sales start at 7am. but we were talking to the neighbor and he said it is garage sale MADNESS...like nothing we've ever seen before. hey, i just might have to whip out the camera if it gets too silly. who knows. ha ha! yikes, i'm a little worried, hopefully no one is too pushy. i really don't like having yard sales. who knows, maybe i will find something to buy from my neighbors. :)
other than that - we are planning on going to the OC fair this weekend. i can't believe it's almost here and gone! we usually go to it at the beginning but we've just been busy. it seems for our family the summers are CRAZY busy. we have SO many birthdays and family gatherings and parties and this year we had a vacation {hopefully we continue that as a tradition, next year hopefully it's Hawaii! i wouldn't mind NYC again though!}.
Haylee has an agent audition in the morning...so pray for her on that. we have to get her going with that. she starts soccer next month and then she will start 1st grade in Sept! yikes. i don't even want to think that i'm a mom to a {almost} 6 year old/1st grader! where in the world has the time gone? they grow up so fast, you can't blink, you'll miss it. i always thought that was stupid when people said that, but i truly can understand it now. it's so bittersweet for me. i could tear up just thinking about it. so i won't. :)
i think that's it friends! i hope you all have a fantabulous weekend!! people comment, email or facebook me {or text OR better yet CALL me} to let me know what's going on in your lives. i love to hear from you all. i don't even know who reads my blog anymore...unless you comment. sometimes some of you do and i'm thinking, WOW...really? you read my blog? :) i feel honored. ;) love you all! xoxo
eye opening...
So life has taken on a whole new meaning to me recently. I will not go into any details just to protect the person I am talking about because some of you know her. But a friend of mine is going through some potentially huge life changes/events. It is really eye opening for me personally because this person and I are a lot alike in many ways {in a lot of ways we are different though too}. It’s just a matter of one little wave and your course of life could change entirely. In a way that scares the crap out of me. I am not one to take and accept small disruptions in life’s everyday schedule. I’m pretty much a “by the book” person and if it’s not written in my planner and it happens…well it throws me off a bit.
I could not imagine living life a different way or in a different place or with a different person or anything other than what I am doing now next week. Meaning…it must be planned out. Not that I have my whole life mapped out…sometimes I don’t even know what I’m doing tomorrow. But for the most part, I feel like the priorities {what I deem priorities that is} are pretty much planned or in the process of being planned out.
I think this is sometimes where my human nature goes wrong. Things don’t always go as planned. I’ve come to find that out and sometimes I learn the hard way {sometimes it’s the only way I seem to learn, unfortunately}. So what happens then? I don’t know how people do it without God. He’s really the only way I could ever get through huge life changing events. It must be a lonely, nerve wrecking {not that it’s not nerve wrecking WITH Him at times, when human nature tries to battle and take over…but failing endlessly} – anyway, it must be hard. Luckily my friend HAS God. She is so much stronger than people give her credit for and so much stronger than most people will ever know. But I know.
Ironically enough, her strength and belief and faith {in her desperate hour} has really drawn me close to the things that matter a lot to me. I find myself wanting to do things differently, thinking differently, walking in a different light. She probably doesn’t know this but it’s true. I want SO much to save her from what she is going through and find myself just crying for her because she’s in so much pain. I think sometimes I am way too sympathetic in that way. I think it’s great that I CAN sympathize but sometimes I just worry so much about that person…not healthy for me. I’m a little sad in a way that this person is having to deal with all of the things she has. To me, she has never had a “break” in life from her childhood on up to her adult life. God is going to grow her in so many ways though, He has made her weathered and broken for a reason. If you think about it, please just pray for her. I know she could use as much as she can get.
Thanks for reading…
I could not imagine living life a different way or in a different place or with a different person or anything other than what I am doing now next week. Meaning…it must be planned out. Not that I have my whole life mapped out…sometimes I don’t even know what I’m doing tomorrow. But for the most part, I feel like the priorities {what I deem priorities that is} are pretty much planned or in the process of being planned out.
I think this is sometimes where my human nature goes wrong. Things don’t always go as planned. I’ve come to find that out and sometimes I learn the hard way {sometimes it’s the only way I seem to learn, unfortunately}. So what happens then? I don’t know how people do it without God. He’s really the only way I could ever get through huge life changing events. It must be a lonely, nerve wrecking {not that it’s not nerve wrecking WITH Him at times, when human nature tries to battle and take over…but failing endlessly} – anyway, it must be hard. Luckily my friend HAS God. She is so much stronger than people give her credit for and so much stronger than most people will ever know. But I know.
Ironically enough, her strength and belief and faith {in her desperate hour} has really drawn me close to the things that matter a lot to me. I find myself wanting to do things differently, thinking differently, walking in a different light. She probably doesn’t know this but it’s true. I want SO much to save her from what she is going through and find myself just crying for her because she’s in so much pain. I think sometimes I am way too sympathetic in that way. I think it’s great that I CAN sympathize but sometimes I just worry so much about that person…not healthy for me. I’m a little sad in a way that this person is having to deal with all of the things she has. To me, she has never had a “break” in life from her childhood on up to her adult life. God is going to grow her in so many ways though, He has made her weathered and broken for a reason. If you think about it, please just pray for her. I know she could use as much as she can get.
Thanks for reading…
it's been pleasant
today was nice. this morning was Haylee's 1st day of vacation Bible school at our church...so i dropped her off at Grammie's for that {Grammie is taking the girls to that this week}...she is spending the night there tonight and then i pick her up Tues night after work. then i drop her off on Wed and she spends the night Wed night and i pick her up Thurs night after work. whew! summers are busy with a kid i tell ya! ;)
work was pretty quiet today...for a Monday that is. we took one of the ladies out, it was her 5 yr anniversary of working at our accounting firm, so the whole admin department took her out to El Torito for lunch. i love El Torito...yum! after that i did a few things i needed to get done and the day just went by very smoothly and it was pretty quiet and just nice. no drama. :)
after work i didn't have to pick up Haylee since she's spending the night at Grammie's, so that was a little odd for me. LOL. i just went straight home {all the while feeling like i forgot something!} and then Tim came home shortly after, he worked out while i surfed the web, ate some chips, watched Juno and cut out some sight words for Haylee to start practicing for the 1st grade. ;) i'm pretty multi-talented like that sometimes.
when he got home we went to our fav hang out spot...The Stadium. funny how it's in our old city we used to live in, but yet we still go ALL of the time. i just love their blonde beer {they brew their own - it's a brewery} and the food is just always SO good. i can't explain it, it's a good atmosphere. they are starting recognize us too, they comped our beer. :) yay! it's like Cheers...."where everybody knows your name....". just kidding. kinda. anyway after that we walked around Barnes & Noble...i love that store. i love the smell of books. once upon a time i read books like crazy. then i had a child and i only read books with pictures and small words. ha ha! so i'm going to get back into the swing of reading because i just love it SO much. words are how i express myself and i just love reading too, when i can find the time.
i actually ended up buying a BIG book on digital photography, which i cannot WAIT to start reading. exciting! i don't even have my camera yet....it's coming soon i can feel it. i cannot wait. i am going to photograph everything i possibly can just to practice and train myself. what a perfect spot for me too...near the beach and the beautiful California scenery. love it.
now we are at home and Tim's playing the new NCAA football game {since i messed up his old one...oops} and i'm blogging.
i do have a request...i am looking for a GOOD women's study bible. if anyone knows of one they really LOVE, please recommend it to me! what i want is something, maybe NIV or NKJV version...with all of the scriptures {the most important part!} with maybe some stories or a summary of what the verses mean {a commentary} and how they can pertain to my life. i need something...i know it sounds bad, but i get bored of just reading the scriptures and sometimes i am not sure what they mean, so i go to the commentary but then i like the little devotional stories too...i just want something lumped into ONE. any recommendations??
work was pretty quiet today...for a Monday that is. we took one of the ladies out, it was her 5 yr anniversary of working at our accounting firm, so the whole admin department took her out to El Torito for lunch. i love El Torito...yum! after that i did a few things i needed to get done and the day just went by very smoothly and it was pretty quiet and just nice. no drama. :)
after work i didn't have to pick up Haylee since she's spending the night at Grammie's, so that was a little odd for me. LOL. i just went straight home {all the while feeling like i forgot something!} and then Tim came home shortly after, he worked out while i surfed the web, ate some chips, watched Juno and cut out some sight words for Haylee to start practicing for the 1st grade. ;) i'm pretty multi-talented like that sometimes.
when he got home we went to our fav hang out spot...The Stadium. funny how it's in our old city we used to live in, but yet we still go ALL of the time. i just love their blonde beer {they brew their own - it's a brewery} and the food is just always SO good. i can't explain it, it's a good atmosphere. they are starting recognize us too, they comped our beer. :) yay! it's like Cheers...."where everybody knows your name....". just kidding. kinda. anyway after that we walked around Barnes & Noble...i love that store. i love the smell of books. once upon a time i read books like crazy. then i had a child and i only read books with pictures and small words. ha ha! so i'm going to get back into the swing of reading because i just love it SO much. words are how i express myself and i just love reading too, when i can find the time.
i actually ended up buying a BIG book on digital photography, which i cannot WAIT to start reading. exciting! i don't even have my camera yet....it's coming soon i can feel it. i cannot wait. i am going to photograph everything i possibly can just to practice and train myself. what a perfect spot for me too...near the beach and the beautiful California scenery. love it.
now we are at home and Tim's playing the new NCAA football game {since i messed up his old one...oops} and i'm blogging.
i do have a request...i am looking for a GOOD women's study bible. if anyone knows of one they really LOVE, please recommend it to me! what i want is something, maybe NIV or NKJV version...with all of the scriptures {the most important part!} with maybe some stories or a summary of what the verses mean {a commentary} and how they can pertain to my life. i need something...i know it sounds bad, but i get bored of just reading the scriptures and sometimes i am not sure what they mean, so i go to the commentary but then i like the little devotional stories too...i just want something lumped into ONE. any recommendations??
i don't want to have regrets...here goes...
i hope this doesn't get too long but i think it's something that must be said. even though i am aware of who all reads my blog {well maybe not everyone} i think i just have to say it. i hope i can type the words that express exactly how i feel, i usually don't have a problem with that, but i try to be a very open and honest person with a lot of areas of my life, but there are PLENTY of areas i keep closed off to all. i'm sure we all do.
this morning at church the pastor spoke about regrets. mostly things we wished we could have done or things we didn't do or say that we wished we could have...and then one day it's too late. i really hope that does not happen to me. i feel like i have fulfilled a lot in life so far and i'm only 28 {wow, usually i don't say "only"...but i feel relatively young today i guess, lol}. seriously though...i served in the military for 4 years, i have been married almost 9 years, i have an almost 6 year old, i have a decent job, i have a house, a car....i feel like during the course of my life thus far i have many accomplishments too. career wise, relationship wise, and being a parent is one of life's grandest accomplishments of course. i am so very blessed.
there are things already in life that i regret not doing. going to school and getting a degree for instance. and all too often {maybe it doesn't seem like it to outsiders, but i feel like this a lot}, that gets thrown in my face. i am not ashamed, i took a different route in life than most people. my parents couldn't afford to help me pay for college, i did not get scholarships nor did i have my little heart set on a college or university i wanted to go to my whole life. i did, however really want to serve others. i didn't know how and i knew i was not ready for college, so i really prayed and thought a lot about it (my junior yr in high school on...) and opted to join the military. it was the scariest, yet exciting thing i ever branched out and did. and it was VERY rewarding in the end. i know that was God's plan for me all along now because the military is where i met Tim. he met me, started getting his life back on track by going to church and he accepted Christ as his Savior shortly after he met me. i am not saying that this is my doing at all, this was God's will. :)
but i do regret not going to school while i was either single or going to school and staying in when Tim and i were in the service together. we could have our Masters by now. Tim is attaining that goal faster than i am now. i know i could totally still do it, and i might. but i do regret i never finished that to this day. it's only through trial and error i discovered my calling in life is to be a photographer. ;) but at least i know it's what i want to do now i guess. at least it's not too late for me to do that....hee hee. it would, however, be too late if i wanted to become a doctor (not that i want to, but i think you get the point).
i regret a few {and only a few} other things that i did not say to people i should have. i think we all have those types of regrets. i should've told my cousin that i loved her more before she was killed. i should have said a few things to my family back in the day that might have salvaged relationships {or maybe not, maybe that is why God did what he did}. i know i wished i could have or would have said this or that, but i don't dwell on it. what's done is done.
i just don't want any regrets ever. so i hope you all know...my family, my friends, the people i talk to on a daily basis, my fellow bloggers, my dearest to my heart...i love you guys. :) i love my family even though if i were to choose, some of them probably wouldn't have been my first choice in relatives... lol...i love you anyway. i love you even if you hate me. even if you have a grudge or something against me. i love you dearly and i always have, even through the bad. i'm sorry if i have ever hurt anyone...friends and family alike. sometimes i talk without thinking {alot of times?}. sometimes i do things and don't think of others. but i will always love you.
so before i die...before i leave...before i don't see you ever again {sorry but i wanted to type this out...} i would like to become an AWESOME paid photographer. i want to be a mother that Haylee looks up to and wants to model her life after. i want to travel to a lot of different countries to experience it all. i want to live my life to it's fullest. i don't want regrets. :)
now...enough being deep. :) guess what little miss melissa did to herself today? well...i got my VERY 1st TATTOO. i know...some of you might be saying "what?!?!" right now {unless you've been reading my blog, lol}. yes, yes i did. and i LOVE it! i have been pondering a tattoo for 3 years now. i never found one i really wanted...i knew i wanted something FEMININE though. what's more feminine than a butterfly? they are the most BEAUTIFUL of God's insects, i think anyway. they are ugly and icky and they cocoon and become something absolutely beautiful...and one day they are free. they have a very short life span though...but they are the most beautiful things. so i found one, a little abstract and i had him add a little bit of color too.
it's a little puffy still but it's great...i really like it a lot. if you want to see more pics of it, i am making an album on my facebook {whenever facebook is back up....it's currently down}.
cute right?! :) comment me, let me know what you think...it's still scabby and puffy...but hopefully in a few days it will look a lot better! yay! have a super great WEEK! xoxoxo
this morning at church the pastor spoke about regrets. mostly things we wished we could have done or things we didn't do or say that we wished we could have...and then one day it's too late. i really hope that does not happen to me. i feel like i have fulfilled a lot in life so far and i'm only 28 {wow, usually i don't say "only"...but i feel relatively young today i guess, lol}. seriously though...i served in the military for 4 years, i have been married almost 9 years, i have an almost 6 year old, i have a decent job, i have a house, a car....i feel like during the course of my life thus far i have many accomplishments too. career wise, relationship wise, and being a parent is one of life's grandest accomplishments of course. i am so very blessed.
there are things already in life that i regret not doing. going to school and getting a degree for instance. and all too often {maybe it doesn't seem like it to outsiders, but i feel like this a lot}, that gets thrown in my face. i am not ashamed, i took a different route in life than most people. my parents couldn't afford to help me pay for college, i did not get scholarships nor did i have my little heart set on a college or university i wanted to go to my whole life. i did, however really want to serve others. i didn't know how and i knew i was not ready for college, so i really prayed and thought a lot about it (my junior yr in high school on...) and opted to join the military. it was the scariest, yet exciting thing i ever branched out and did. and it was VERY rewarding in the end. i know that was God's plan for me all along now because the military is where i met Tim. he met me, started getting his life back on track by going to church and he accepted Christ as his Savior shortly after he met me. i am not saying that this is my doing at all, this was God's will. :)
but i do regret not going to school while i was either single or going to school and staying in when Tim and i were in the service together. we could have our Masters by now. Tim is attaining that goal faster than i am now. i know i could totally still do it, and i might. but i do regret i never finished that to this day. it's only through trial and error i discovered my calling in life is to be a photographer. ;) but at least i know it's what i want to do now i guess. at least it's not too late for me to do that....hee hee. it would, however, be too late if i wanted to become a doctor (not that i want to, but i think you get the point).
i regret a few {and only a few} other things that i did not say to people i should have. i think we all have those types of regrets. i should've told my cousin that i loved her more before she was killed. i should have said a few things to my family back in the day that might have salvaged relationships {or maybe not, maybe that is why God did what he did}. i know i wished i could have or would have said this or that, but i don't dwell on it. what's done is done.
i just don't want any regrets ever. so i hope you all know...my family, my friends, the people i talk to on a daily basis, my fellow bloggers, my dearest to my heart...i love you guys. :) i love my family even though if i were to choose, some of them probably wouldn't have been my first choice in relatives... lol...i love you anyway. i love you even if you hate me. even if you have a grudge or something against me. i love you dearly and i always have, even through the bad. i'm sorry if i have ever hurt anyone...friends and family alike. sometimes i talk without thinking {alot of times?}. sometimes i do things and don't think of others. but i will always love you.
so before i die...before i leave...before i don't see you ever again {sorry but i wanted to type this out...} i would like to become an AWESOME paid photographer. i want to be a mother that Haylee looks up to and wants to model her life after. i want to travel to a lot of different countries to experience it all. i want to live my life to it's fullest. i don't want regrets. :)
now...enough being deep. :) guess what little miss melissa did to herself today? well...i got my VERY 1st TATTOO. i know...some of you might be saying "what?!?!" right now {unless you've been reading my blog, lol}. yes, yes i did. and i LOVE it! i have been pondering a tattoo for 3 years now. i never found one i really wanted...i knew i wanted something FEMININE though. what's more feminine than a butterfly? they are the most BEAUTIFUL of God's insects, i think anyway. they are ugly and icky and they cocoon and become something absolutely beautiful...and one day they are free. they have a very short life span though...but they are the most beautiful things. so i found one, a little abstract and i had him add a little bit of color too.
it's a little puffy still but it's great...i really like it a lot. if you want to see more pics of it, i am making an album on my facebook {whenever facebook is back up....it's currently down}.
cute right?! :) comment me, let me know what you think...it's still scabby and puffy...but hopefully in a few days it will look a lot better! yay! have a super great WEEK! xoxoxo
social distortion
...story of my life. life seems to NEVER go as planned. there are only a few set things in my life that have gone as planned...lol. i have to say that both involve my wonderful hubby (our wedding and our child)...other than that i can't say life has always gone as planned.
i guess i'm complaining a little because things always change and it seems like i plan one thing and everyone does something different. but whatever...i'm still going to have fun no matter what. ;) i won't get all into it. but i'm just happy because it's the weekend! yes!! thank goodness!
last night i got my haircut! i was soooooooooooo happy because my friend recommended me to this guy that does cuts for only $30 {so much cheaper than my last stylist who bumped me up to $70 after going to her for 3 years!}. so this guy came to my HOUSE and cut mine and my friend's hair and IT IS AWESOME. i actually like it better than my last girl. ;) i was reluctant to let a man do it, last time i did it was BUTCHED...but michael did awesome and i am stoked. :) completely. here it is....it's hard to tell, but it's a shorter version of what i had, a little modified, and so nice...LOVE it. ok sorry but blogger is being crazy & won't let me post my pic! wah!
NOT my day. ;) hopefully tomorrow and sunday go GREAT. i have some things planned & i will share them with you either sunday night or monday! have a super weekend...love to you all my blogger reader friends. xoxo
**updated....hopefully this will work & you can see my picture of my new 'do! ;)
i guess i'm complaining a little because things always change and it seems like i plan one thing and everyone does something different. but whatever...i'm still going to have fun no matter what. ;) i won't get all into it. but i'm just happy because it's the weekend! yes!! thank goodness!
last night i got my haircut! i was soooooooooooo happy because my friend recommended me to this guy that does cuts for only $30 {so much cheaper than my last stylist who bumped me up to $70 after going to her for 3 years!}. so this guy came to my HOUSE and cut mine and my friend's hair and IT IS AWESOME. i actually like it better than my last girl. ;) i was reluctant to let a man do it, last time i did it was BUTCHED...but michael did awesome and i am stoked. :) completely. here it is....it's hard to tell, but it's a shorter version of what i had, a little modified, and so nice...LOVE it. ok sorry but blogger is being crazy & won't let me post my pic! wah!
NOT my day. ;) hopefully tomorrow and sunday go GREAT. i have some things planned & i will share them with you either sunday night or monday! have a super weekend...love to you all my blogger reader friends. xoxo
**updated....hopefully this will work & you can see my picture of my new 'do! ;)
i find myself...
...blessed. just blessed. i feel really bad because i feel like i just flew off the handle a lot today. i really tend to do that when i get frustrated or feeling like i don't have my things under control. i am so OCD that way sometimes. i like things to run smoothly and when they do, sometimes i freak a little. i'm a little over-the-top, but i just think that's fine in moderation. ;) what can i do, it's the way i was made. ha!
but tonight as i sit here on the couch, alone. {tim went out with a few friends, i hear haylee upstairs watching tv - getting ready to crash soon and miley-the-super-hyper-crazy-dog is out in the backyard running in circles chasing her tail-nub} i realize that i'm blessed.
i often find myself complaining about the smallest things in life, the most finite imperfections that i come across throughout my day... someone at work pisses me off -- well, at least i have a place to work...some people struggle to get jobs {i've also been blessed with the position i am working in because i feel like i make a significant income compared to others in my shoes}. i complain how "hot" it is in my house -- well, at least i have a roof over my head. my house is bigger than my family even really needs. it has AC, but we don't like to keep it running all of the time, most nights we do...thank GOD at least i have a house {and gosh darnit, it has a pool and jacuzzi...i could jump in to cool off!}.
i just think when you put life into perspective, most of the time you come out on top. do i really deserve everything i have? no. i don't think so. i have it pretty good. a good husband who is an even better dad...the most beautiful and smartest little girl i could have ever asked for...great friends. the best friends really, some old and some new and some i am still learning all about, but i love my relationships with each and every one of them. they are all unique and they help me get through things, even when they don't know it. just a few simple words. they mean so much to me. and because God has a sense of humor, i have a dog. ;) she is dumber than a sack of bricks, but thank God for her. she really can frustrate me and make me pee my pants laugh in one instant. oh miley. lol!
i just think of all the places i've "been" in life and i think the NOW tops it off as one of the BEST times in my life. i know not everyone can say that. i know i've been in some pretty crappy times. i've been in some really low times in life. so i know maybe some of you might be reading this thinking "ya...she's got it all, she's so blessed....but what about in hard times?". i just want you to know...we all go there. :) it gets better. i think you just have to look inside your heart (and mind) and figure out where your heart is set. is it set on the negative in life? or is it set to the positive? is it set on God? or the expectations of man? you can't please man...
i don't know where all this is coming from - well i kind of do. i talked to a friend tonight who kind of reminded me of what matters most in life. God. i appreciate Him so much, i know i don't show it like i should all of the time. but i think it's time i give him more kuddos, what he deserves. it's easy to think in the positive if you are focused on HIM.
i think we all needed to be reminded of that once in awhile.
but tonight as i sit here on the couch, alone. {tim went out with a few friends, i hear haylee upstairs watching tv - getting ready to crash soon and miley-the-super-hyper-crazy-dog is out in the backyard running in circles chasing her tail-nub} i realize that i'm blessed.
i often find myself complaining about the smallest things in life, the most finite imperfections that i come across throughout my day... someone at work pisses me off -- well, at least i have a place to work...some people struggle to get jobs {i've also been blessed with the position i am working in because i feel like i make a significant income compared to others in my shoes}. i complain how "hot" it is in my house -- well, at least i have a roof over my head. my house is bigger than my family even really needs. it has AC, but we don't like to keep it running all of the time, most nights we do...thank GOD at least i have a house {and gosh darnit, it has a pool and jacuzzi...i could jump in to cool off!}.
i just think when you put life into perspective, most of the time you come out on top. do i really deserve everything i have? no. i don't think so. i have it pretty good. a good husband who is an even better dad...the most beautiful and smartest little girl i could have ever asked for...great friends. the best friends really, some old and some new and some i am still learning all about, but i love my relationships with each and every one of them. they are all unique and they help me get through things, even when they don't know it. just a few simple words. they mean so much to me. and because God has a sense of humor, i have a dog. ;) she is dumber than a sack of bricks, but thank God for her. she really can frustrate me and make me pee my pants laugh in one instant. oh miley. lol!
i just think of all the places i've "been" in life and i think the NOW tops it off as one of the BEST times in my life. i know not everyone can say that. i know i've been in some pretty crappy times. i've been in some really low times in life. so i know maybe some of you might be reading this thinking "ya...she's got it all, she's so blessed....but what about in hard times?". i just want you to know...we all go there. :) it gets better. i think you just have to look inside your heart (and mind) and figure out where your heart is set. is it set on the negative in life? or is it set to the positive? is it set on God? or the expectations of man? you can't please man...
i don't know where all this is coming from - well i kind of do. i talked to a friend tonight who kind of reminded me of what matters most in life. God. i appreciate Him so much, i know i don't show it like i should all of the time. but i think it's time i give him more kuddos, what he deserves. it's easy to think in the positive if you are focused on HIM.
i think we all needed to be reminded of that once in awhile.
you probably get bored of reading but...
...then again you might not. that is the beauty of a BLOG. it's just that. a blog. like it or not, i can say WHATEVER i want to on here. trust me, i hold back A LOT. just because i have to. i am aware of most of the people that read my blog. i've been thinking for a long time of going private, but i don't know how much of a hassle that would be to people who do not have a blogger account. i'm thinking a big pain in the ya-know.
anyhoo. today today today...wow today. you woulda thought it were FRIDAY at work. oh there were people there, but there were a lot of people gone today too and it was pretty s-l-o-w for me to say the least. i did end up finding something to do, but goodness i think my peeps are saving stuff up for me to do at the last minute. i know i'm going to be slammed the last few weeks in July, i have already been forewarned. ;) i'm ready, bring it on!
i got off work early today because it's the 3rd tuesday of the month and that is when one of my audit partners has his networking meeting that i have to be in at 7am (actually a little before that) to set up breakfast. my partner-in-crime...my good buddy and pal steph came in early with me. you cannot find a better friend right? the best part?? she bought me a sausage egg mcmuffin from McD's! and it was AWESOME. i almost hugged her. i would have, but she's not into hugs from girls. lol. just kidding. sorry i am in some kind of quirky mood tonight!
i am so very very VERY excited because on thursday my {new} hair stylist is coming over to cut mine and steph's hair! that's right, we're having a hair cut party on thurs! ya! if you want a new hair cut, my place at 6! ;) we're having chipotle for dinner, common' over. ha ha! oh yes, you bet your buns there will be pics. at least of me, steph is kind of camera shy...lol. i don't know why people don't like the camera, i love it. it's not like i LIKE the way i look...i just like the pictures, ha ha!
hmmmmm i feel like i had something else on my mind to blog about. i can't hear my brain over tim playing his EA Sports video game. ;) "off set eye, formation on the back field", lol. i do not know what that means...but since we're on this topic now, i have decided to take an interest this year in learning more about football. i do love to watch it LIVE...and on tv from time to time, but most of the time tim is sitting there explaining it to me. which i think secretly he loves to do, teach me something new about something he has a huge passion for. i guess i figure this...if it's gonna be on for the next 5 months...i might as well join in on the "fun". otherwise it's like i'm a widowed/single mother! LOL. i think some of you ladies know EXACTLY what i mean. yup. ;) if you can't beat 'em, join 'em!
alrighty then - i think it's time for me to close this piece. don't forget to read my blog entry below this one and leave me a comment about a favorite memory you have had with me! i would LOVE to hear about it. peace out....
everyone loves comments! talk to me! :)
Here are the directions:
1. As a comment on my blog, leave one memory that you and I had together. It doesn't matter if you knew me a little or a lot, anything you remember!
2. Next, re-post these instructions on your blog and see how many people leave a memory about you. It's actually pretty funny to see the responses. If you leave a memory about me, I'll assume you're playing the game and I'll come to your blog and leave one about you. If you don't want to play on your blog, or if you don't have a blog, I'll leave my memory of you in my comments. {or I will email you something back!!}
Please play...this should be fun. ;)
XOXO
Melissa
1. As a comment on my blog, leave one memory that you and I had together. It doesn't matter if you knew me a little or a lot, anything you remember!
2. Next, re-post these instructions on your blog and see how many people leave a memory about you. It's actually pretty funny to see the responses. If you leave a memory about me, I'll assume you're playing the game and I'll come to your blog and leave one about you. If you don't want to play on your blog, or if you don't have a blog, I'll leave my memory of you in my comments. {or I will email you something back!!}
Please play...this should be fun. ;)
XOXO
Melissa
went by too fast...
so let's see, i don't think i mentioned it, or maybe i did. friday i left work early to go to the dr's. just a check up, but apparently it was due for my tetanus shot {which you only get every 10 yrs}. i think the last time i got a shot was in the air force, lol. maybe i am wrong. anyway...so i got my shot and it only hurt for a minute. then yesterday morning my arm was SO sore.
i know that you are supposed to get sore from the tetanus shot and knowing me i tensed my arm up because i don't care too much for shots. but this was a different kind of sore, my whole arm was sensitive to touch. then this morning i woke up with a BIG bump (probably the size of a big gumball cut in half?) on my arm. thankfully i had him inject it into my LEFT arm {and i'm right handed}, otherwise it would have been crazy. i have been feeling really out of it the past 2 days, very aloof {ha, more than usual} and very crabby, irritable. then my temp has been pretty high for me {upper 98/low 99's} and you can't even touch my arm without me wincing or wanting to punch you back. :( i have also had headaches. so i googled it [that's what i do] and i have a mild allergic reaction to the tetanus vaccine. great.
it sure doesn't FEEL mild, i even cried today over it and Tim almost made me to go the ER, which would've been sooooo embarrassing. for crying out loud, i've given BIRTH and have been in the MILITARY, no way did i want to go to ER. yikes. so i just manned up, took some motrin and am bucking up. :)) true man style. i just hope i feel better tomorrow, if not, i WILL go to the dr again. at least i can just go back to her, i hate ERs. only been there once with Haylee and NEVER want to go back.
so besides dealing with that my weekend went pretty well. i did not get my tattoo. it's a long story. i did not chicken out and will still get it, but Brian has to get his gun and ink back and i need to get over this allergic reaction thing. prob shouldn't fill my body with unnecessary ink until i do. ;) so sad there. oh well...ce la vie.
last night was fun we had our friends Todd/Ann and Tim's brother Mark, Kat & Noah come over and we played ROCK BAND until MIDNIGHT. :) it was great! there are pics on my facebook if you want to see them, i am too pooped to put them on here right now...sorry.
today we woke up and went to an outdoor mall we haven't been to in awhile...it was fun. it was really humid outside today though so it wasn't that fun, ha ha! after that we went to Huntington Beach...which i have really never been to! i loved it!! all the surf shops, my kinda cute clothing stores, people, bands on the beach, people walking around half nude {well could've gone without that, lol}, the little shops and the cold breeze, it was amazing. we had lunch at Wahoo's which is my fav place for fish tacos. Yum! i took some great pics out there and Haylee held a boa constrictor snake!!!!!!!!!!!!! i will have to blog about that maybe tomorrow on her blog. :) she LOVES snakes and i despise them. i have a fear of them actually. i only got close enough to take the picture and run. ;)
after the beach we went home to change and then we headed up to our church. they had a HUGE church BBQ and had rides, face painting, LOTS of food, music...etc. they have one like once a month and we've been going to this church for 3 years now and it's the first time we've gone to one, hee hee. it was GREAT! prob would've been better if i had been feeling up to it. but Haylee had a blast. her and her "sister-cousin" Lilly rode the HUGE (20 foot? maybe shorter) slide and ate cotton candy and cookies and ran around together. it was good times. i'm so glad she has her cousins close, especially since we aren't having any more kiddies for awhile (if at all). :) Lilly is her age, so that makes it nice. they call each other the sister-cousins because they were the ONLY girls in the fam (until last yr when Miss Emma came along) and they are just two weeks apart in age. it's awesome. love adore each other.
now we are home, i blogged and updated my facebook w/pics and stuff. now i'm really tired! i think it's gonna be an early night for me. have a great week!
i know that you are supposed to get sore from the tetanus shot and knowing me i tensed my arm up because i don't care too much for shots. but this was a different kind of sore, my whole arm was sensitive to touch. then this morning i woke up with a BIG bump (probably the size of a big gumball cut in half?) on my arm. thankfully i had him inject it into my LEFT arm {and i'm right handed}, otherwise it would have been crazy. i have been feeling really out of it the past 2 days, very aloof {ha, more than usual} and very crabby, irritable. then my temp has been pretty high for me {upper 98/low 99's} and you can't even touch my arm without me wincing or wanting to punch you back. :( i have also had headaches. so i googled it [that's what i do] and i have a mild allergic reaction to the tetanus vaccine. great.
it sure doesn't FEEL mild, i even cried today over it and Tim almost made me to go the ER, which would've been sooooo embarrassing. for crying out loud, i've given BIRTH and have been in the MILITARY, no way did i want to go to ER. yikes. so i just manned up, took some motrin and am bucking up. :)) true man style. i just hope i feel better tomorrow, if not, i WILL go to the dr again. at least i can just go back to her, i hate ERs. only been there once with Haylee and NEVER want to go back.
so besides dealing with that my weekend went pretty well. i did not get my tattoo. it's a long story. i did not chicken out and will still get it, but Brian has to get his gun and ink back and i need to get over this allergic reaction thing. prob shouldn't fill my body with unnecessary ink until i do. ;) so sad there. oh well...ce la vie.
last night was fun we had our friends Todd/Ann and Tim's brother Mark, Kat & Noah come over and we played ROCK BAND until MIDNIGHT. :) it was great! there are pics on my facebook if you want to see them, i am too pooped to put them on here right now...sorry.
today we woke up and went to an outdoor mall we haven't been to in awhile...it was fun. it was really humid outside today though so it wasn't that fun, ha ha! after that we went to Huntington Beach...which i have really never been to! i loved it!! all the surf shops, my kinda cute clothing stores, people, bands on the beach, people walking around half nude {well could've gone without that, lol}, the little shops and the cold breeze, it was amazing. we had lunch at Wahoo's which is my fav place for fish tacos. Yum! i took some great pics out there and Haylee held a boa constrictor snake!!!!!!!!!!!!! i will have to blog about that maybe tomorrow on her blog. :) she LOVES snakes and i despise them. i have a fear of them actually. i only got close enough to take the picture and run. ;)
after the beach we went home to change and then we headed up to our church. they had a HUGE church BBQ and had rides, face painting, LOTS of food, music...etc. they have one like once a month and we've been going to this church for 3 years now and it's the first time we've gone to one, hee hee. it was GREAT! prob would've been better if i had been feeling up to it. but Haylee had a blast. her and her "sister-cousin" Lilly rode the HUGE (20 foot? maybe shorter) slide and ate cotton candy and cookies and ran around together. it was good times. i'm so glad she has her cousins close, especially since we aren't having any more kiddies for awhile (if at all). :) Lilly is her age, so that makes it nice. they call each other the sister-cousins because they were the ONLY girls in the fam (until last yr when Miss Emma came along) and they are just two weeks apart in age. it's awesome. love adore each other.
now we are home, i blogged and updated my facebook w/pics and stuff. now i'm really tired! i think it's gonna be an early night for me. have a great week!
expectations...
do you ever wonder why sometimes life doesn't live up to your expectations? does it happen quite frequently to you? i think sometimes, and let's chalk it up to me being extremely idealistic, it gets very discouraging. i don't really know how to fix it, i guess maybe i shouldn't expect much and when awesome things do happen, then i will come out on top. :) lol!
don't get me wrong, i'm not depressed or anything. it just seems lately i've been daydreaming about how things SHOULD be {in the mind of melissa....so scary, don't go there} and then they almost always don't live up to how i imagined. i guess that should be a wake up call for ME that life isn't always going to go the way MELISSA thinks it should go. it's GOD'S plan in which i should be seeking. i've said it before, and i will say it again, i feel like i sometimes slip away...for too long from God. it's a really big confession, maybe too big to be admitting on my blog, but it's the honest truth. i don't like it. i don't want to be in that place. but it happens. at least i know how to fix it. the right mindset and the right crowd of people i surround myself around. the things i let go into my head.
ever heard that childhood song: "oh be careful little eyes what you see, oh be careful little eyes what you see! for the father up above is looking down in love, oh be careful little eyes what you see. oh be careful little mouth what you say, oh be careful little mouth what you say! for the father up above is looking down in love...."....and so on and so forth. :) i know that is what i have to do. it's what we ALL have to do as natural human beings. we are all prone to sin, it has been written from the beginning of time. i wish i could be perfect! but as a human, i can't live up to it really...i'm very imperfect. {we ALL are}
back to expectations...of life. i think i need to be MORE realistic. :) i have to work on that.
today i got up thinking i would take Haylee to her performing arts school because every other week they have an agent there for the kids to interview. so we got ALL ready, i had her practicing her Happy Meal commercial in the bathroom mirror ALL morning! we got all excited, got to the school and there was NO agent there. :( it was very disheartening for me. Haylee really didn't mind at all, but i was still sad for her. i know she wants this and i could really care less if it happened, but since SHE wants it so bad, it makes me want to help her get there. we're actually going to post-pone her acting classes during the rest of the summer & fall since she has soccer and that takes up a good amount of time. it's hard when BOTH parents work and then you have to rush around after work/school to get the kid where it needs to go. sometimes i wish i could duplicate myself just for that reason! ;)
i was also supposed to get my tattoo today. but bless my brother in law's kind heart...he lent out his tattooing equipment to a friend who is never home. so he's having a hard time getting it back. so that didn't happen either. hopefully tomorrow...but i think i'll put it in my mind that it's not going to happen that way if it does, it's a pleasant surprise, LOL! :) i hope so! i am really excited for it anyway. but of course i was sad {not at Brian, but at the fact it didn't happen}.
tonight we are having our friends Todd & Ann over as well as Tim's brother Mark & Kathy & Noah! so it should be fun. we're having pizza and playing ROCK BAND all night. yay! i will take some pictures. {duh} i hope you all have an excellent weekend. love to everyone...melissa
don't get me wrong, i'm not depressed or anything. it just seems lately i've been daydreaming about how things SHOULD be {in the mind of melissa....so scary, don't go there} and then they almost always don't live up to how i imagined. i guess that should be a wake up call for ME that life isn't always going to go the way MELISSA thinks it should go. it's GOD'S plan in which i should be seeking. i've said it before, and i will say it again, i feel like i sometimes slip away...for too long from God. it's a really big confession, maybe too big to be admitting on my blog, but it's the honest truth. i don't like it. i don't want to be in that place. but it happens. at least i know how to fix it. the right mindset and the right crowd of people i surround myself around. the things i let go into my head.
ever heard that childhood song: "oh be careful little eyes what you see, oh be careful little eyes what you see! for the father up above is looking down in love, oh be careful little eyes what you see. oh be careful little mouth what you say, oh be careful little mouth what you say! for the father up above is looking down in love...."....and so on and so forth. :) i know that is what i have to do. it's what we ALL have to do as natural human beings. we are all prone to sin, it has been written from the beginning of time. i wish i could be perfect! but as a human, i can't live up to it really...i'm very imperfect. {we ALL are}
back to expectations...of life. i think i need to be MORE realistic. :) i have to work on that.
today i got up thinking i would take Haylee to her performing arts school because every other week they have an agent there for the kids to interview. so we got ALL ready, i had her practicing her Happy Meal commercial in the bathroom mirror ALL morning! we got all excited, got to the school and there was NO agent there. :( it was very disheartening for me. Haylee really didn't mind at all, but i was still sad for her. i know she wants this and i could really care less if it happened, but since SHE wants it so bad, it makes me want to help her get there. we're actually going to post-pone her acting classes during the rest of the summer & fall since she has soccer and that takes up a good amount of time. it's hard when BOTH parents work and then you have to rush around after work/school to get the kid where it needs to go. sometimes i wish i could duplicate myself just for that reason! ;)
i was also supposed to get my tattoo today. but bless my brother in law's kind heart...he lent out his tattooing equipment to a friend who is never home. so he's having a hard time getting it back. so that didn't happen either. hopefully tomorrow...but i think i'll put it in my mind that it's not going to happen that way if it does, it's a pleasant surprise, LOL! :) i hope so! i am really excited for it anyway. but of course i was sad {not at Brian, but at the fact it didn't happen}.
tonight we are having our friends Todd & Ann over as well as Tim's brother Mark & Kathy & Noah! so it should be fun. we're having pizza and playing ROCK BAND all night. yay! i will take some pictures. {duh} i hope you all have an excellent weekend. love to everyone...melissa
7-11...free slurpee day!
soooo...did you know that in honor of it being july 11th (7-11) they have FREE slurpees at 7-Eleven gas stations? yup! it's true. during my break today {since i didn't get a lunch...leavin' early for a dr's appointment, yipee}, my buddy steph and i drove down to our local 7-Eleven and got our free 7.11 oz cup of scrumilicious {yes, it's a word} SLURPEEEEEE!i had my FAV energy drink Full Throttle Blue Demon slurpee {yea, who knew?! i know, right?!} and steph made herself a suicide slurpee which i personally think is gross, but to each their own. ;) cheers! it was a very special moment for us, yesireee. we love to have fun. she's definitely my partner-in-crime at work. :))
i hope you all have a fabulous weekend! we will be busy once again...hopefully i will have more pictures and some updates on miss haylee. love - mel
life as i know it
i was just thinking {and there i go again} tonight, pondering on the stages of life and friends and family and how they function and fit into your life throughout the years. i know, i'm odd that way, i really do think so very randomly. one minute i will be talking about free slurpee friday {which is THIS friday by the way at your local 7-Eleven!} and the next minute i'll switch it up and talk about hair. it's just how my mind thinks and functions. lol!
anyway...just thinking. my friends and i were talking about it today a little at lunch, what is considered a 'normal' life? i mean things happen throughout your life and good or bad you take it and make it work and you get through those things, but what is really considered normal? i think that a lot of times - and this is coming from my experience of parenting thus far - you really try to do what you think is right. but what if what you think is right, isn't really right? what if there was a better way? what if one small {or large} decision could change your child's outcome on life forever? i know for a fact {speaking as an individual who has been through some things in life and speaking as a parent who ponders on these things with my own child} that one decision can change a life/lifestyle forever.
i think that is what really scares me MOST about being a parent. i think it is a factor that hinders me from wanting more kids. i know i am being blatantly honest on here and probably pretty vulnerable but it's true. i cringe at the thought that my IMPERFECTIONS can affect another human beings life. forever. isn't it a scary thought, if you analyze it even for a little bit? or am i reading too much into it {i often do}. i know that sometimes i struggle trying to be the best parent i can be, but what if it's not good enough? i know that it also depends on the child, but i really believe it stems from the roots {parenting}.
anyway...i was also thinking how crazy it is how our friends {and family} affect our lives and our everyday decisions. if you hang around negative people and dwell on the not so important things in life, that is what you'll also end up doing. if you stick with the more positive crowd, you will most likely be a happier, brighter person. am i wrong here? i don't think so. ;) i know that just by being at work if ONE person comes in with the slightest attitude, it can actually bring MY presence down also. i could've been more chipper than a little birdie but one person can drag me down faster than anything. misery loves company i guess it is true. i try to steer clear of those people though {but sometimes i am that person, ha!}.
i'm in deep thought tonight for some reason. i guess i look around and wonder why people do the things they do and act they way they do and even run their companies the way they do...i'm not sure i could do it better, i'm just saying it's weird how different we all are. we are all so much a like, yet very different. :) unique. in every way.
i guess i just needed to get that out of my head. goodnight.
anyway...just thinking. my friends and i were talking about it today a little at lunch, what is considered a 'normal' life? i mean things happen throughout your life and good or bad you take it and make it work and you get through those things, but what is really considered normal? i think that a lot of times - and this is coming from my experience of parenting thus far - you really try to do what you think is right. but what if what you think is right, isn't really right? what if there was a better way? what if one small {or large} decision could change your child's outcome on life forever? i know for a fact {speaking as an individual who has been through some things in life and speaking as a parent who ponders on these things with my own child} that one decision can change a life/lifestyle forever.
i think that is what really scares me MOST about being a parent. i think it is a factor that hinders me from wanting more kids. i know i am being blatantly honest on here and probably pretty vulnerable but it's true. i cringe at the thought that my IMPERFECTIONS can affect another human beings life. forever. isn't it a scary thought, if you analyze it even for a little bit? or am i reading too much into it {i often do}. i know that sometimes i struggle trying to be the best parent i can be, but what if it's not good enough? i know that it also depends on the child, but i really believe it stems from the roots {parenting}.
anyway...i was also thinking how crazy it is how our friends {and family} affect our lives and our everyday decisions. if you hang around negative people and dwell on the not so important things in life, that is what you'll also end up doing. if you stick with the more positive crowd, you will most likely be a happier, brighter person. am i wrong here? i don't think so. ;) i know that just by being at work if ONE person comes in with the slightest attitude, it can actually bring MY presence down also. i could've been more chipper than a little birdie but one person can drag me down faster than anything. misery loves company i guess it is true. i try to steer clear of those people though {but sometimes i am that person, ha!}.
i'm in deep thought tonight for some reason. i guess i look around and wonder why people do the things they do and act they way they do and even run their companies the way they do...i'm not sure i could do it better, i'm just saying it's weird how different we all are. we are all so much a like, yet very different. :) unique. in every way.
i guess i just needed to get that out of my head. goodnight.
deep thinker?
am i a deep thinker? i was told i was a deep thinker today. maybe i am, i'm not sure. i think the fact i'm analyzing that thought is an indication that i am? lol! i do tend to over analyze things, that's for sure, but i'm not sure if that is the same as being a "deep thinker".
anyway today was a good day! work seems to be going by so slowly, which i remember being typical this time of year. it's good in a way so that i can get all of my files and spreadsheets updated that i need to...things i couldn't get organized when i was too busy helping other people do their jobs. :) it's also been really quiet at work because a lot of people are on vacation. makes me want to go on another vacation! ;) i'd go back to new york in a heartbeat, that's for sure. but where am i really craving to go??...germany. or london. i'd really go anywhere, but i am dying to see some ancient architecture and just photograph the crap outta it too. lol!! you know i will!!!
i am thinking of going to mexico next month on a mission trip. it's through a program my church does every month. they go to mexico once a month to build homes for the less fortunate. i just think it's for a good cause and it's something i've been wanting to do now for over a year! i know it's going to be hot and a lot of hard labor, but i'm all for it. i really want to go hopefully i will be able to in august or september at the latest. i need to go before i have to get a passport {i don't have to get one just yet!}.
tonight was good! haylee and i got home and washed my {very dirty} car. the darn sprinklers hit my car every night and the water spots were just BAKED on. i couldn't even get them off and i washed it 4 times. :( i was so sad, but then timmy to the rescue! he came home and squeegeed my windows and got most of it off. argh, it frustrated me. {that i couldn't get it off} after that i grilled hamburgers on the grill {my very favorite way to cook!} and then we all went for a swim. i had my clothes on and decided i was too tired {aka lazy} to change into my 'kini so off i went...into the jacuzzi...clothes and all. it was awesome. so me, so random. love it. ;)
i hope everyone's having a fabulous week! this weekend i am hoping to get my very first tattoo...hopefully my bro-in-law is ready for me!! {he's an awesome tattoo artist} we shall see. it'll be a surprise. ;) tootles for now...peace out homies...
anyway today was a good day! work seems to be going by so slowly, which i remember being typical this time of year. it's good in a way so that i can get all of my files and spreadsheets updated that i need to...things i couldn't get organized when i was too busy helping other people do their jobs. :) it's also been really quiet at work because a lot of people are on vacation. makes me want to go on another vacation! ;) i'd go back to new york in a heartbeat, that's for sure. but where am i really craving to go??...germany. or london. i'd really go anywhere, but i am dying to see some ancient architecture and just photograph the crap outta it too. lol!! you know i will!!!
i am thinking of going to mexico next month on a mission trip. it's through a program my church does every month. they go to mexico once a month to build homes for the less fortunate. i just think it's for a good cause and it's something i've been wanting to do now for over a year! i know it's going to be hot and a lot of hard labor, but i'm all for it. i really want to go hopefully i will be able to in august or september at the latest. i need to go before i have to get a passport {i don't have to get one just yet!}.
tonight was good! haylee and i got home and washed my {very dirty} car. the darn sprinklers hit my car every night and the water spots were just BAKED on. i couldn't even get them off and i washed it 4 times. :( i was so sad, but then timmy to the rescue! he came home and squeegeed my windows and got most of it off. argh, it frustrated me. {that i couldn't get it off} after that i grilled hamburgers on the grill {my very favorite way to cook!} and then we all went for a swim. i had my clothes on and decided i was too tired {aka lazy} to change into my 'kini so off i went...into the jacuzzi...clothes and all. it was awesome. so me, so random. love it. ;)
i hope everyone's having a fabulous week! this weekend i am hoping to get my very first tattoo...hopefully my bro-in-law is ready for me!! {he's an awesome tattoo artist} we shall see. it'll be a surprise. ;) tootles for now...peace out homies...
family fiesta
oh mercy me! i took soooooo {tooooo} many pictures on the 4th of july family gathering. it was held here at my house...it really pays to have a backyard with a pool, especially on hot days! we are definitely the new party house {'least for the summer!}.
first of all, there were 21 of us all together {and we were missing 2 people}. just a big family...well it is compared to just my side. ;) we get crazy when we're all together, it's always fun...usually a kid cries and something gets broken {let me rephrase that, something always gets broken!}. but all in all we have fun and that's what matters.
i have personally taken a vow to myself to never - ever - EVER 1.) drink tequila ever again and 2.) never let a drunk person mix my drinks {i won't name any names...it wasn't mom though...you know who you are mister!!}. ;) yes, it got crazy for a bit. but i'm still alive and i have lived and learned. HA HA!
here are the pics, i will let them speak for themselves...i took 200 of them, but these are the better ones {minus a few incriminating ones that no one will ever see...but me, hee hee hee}.
Ooops, sorry these darn pics always come out backwards when I load them to photobucket and copy the code. we will go backwards...we ENDED the night with some rock band!
Kat on the guitar...this girl kicks booty!
She's so cute!! Hee hee!
Brian thinkin' he can sing. :)
The whole band!
Jacob pulling a popper firework
Aunt Nicki helping Haylee with hers...love that face!
Emma didn't want anything to do with me....silly girl!
Oh but she LOVED Uncle Timmy! Little stinker! ;)
My little model...Haylee
Michelle was here for 2 weeks! She's in the Air Force stationed in NM now.
Mel & Kat drinkin' margaritas!
Emma eating...so cute!
Dallin & Hunter in the pool
Michelle and her friend "Maybeline" :)
The Grill Master
Jordan didn't want me to take his picture...still cute.
Lilly
Brian...being Brian ;)
Happy Obi
"Nick Lachey"...or is that Mark?
Obi & DB got along JUST right. :)
Maybe a little TOO well!
Tim & Mel
Dallin jumpin' in
I tried to calm her down by taking our pic...LOL
Tyler...too cool.
The girls!
Nicki & Mel
Melissa & Dad
DB & Mom
He's all dressed up for the 4th!
My mini-mums, aren't they cute?
Watermelon, yum!
Haylee was all dressed up for the 4th too!
Me & my girl
first of all, there were 21 of us all together {and we were missing 2 people}. just a big family...well it is compared to just my side. ;) we get crazy when we're all together, it's always fun...usually a kid cries and something gets broken {let me rephrase that, something always gets broken!}. but all in all we have fun and that's what matters.
i have personally taken a vow to myself to never - ever - EVER 1.) drink tequila ever again and 2.) never let a drunk person mix my drinks {i won't name any names...it wasn't mom though...you know who you are mister!!}. ;) yes, it got crazy for a bit. but i'm still alive and i have lived and learned. HA HA!
here are the pics, i will let them speak for themselves...i took 200 of them, but these are the better ones {minus a few incriminating ones that no one will ever see...but me, hee hee hee}.
Ooops, sorry these darn pics always come out backwards when I load them to photobucket and copy the code. we will go backwards...we ENDED the night with some rock band!
Kat on the guitar...this girl kicks booty!
She's so cute!! Hee hee!
Brian thinkin' he can sing. :)
The whole band!
Jacob pulling a popper firework
Aunt Nicki helping Haylee with hers...love that face!
Emma didn't want anything to do with me....silly girl!
Oh but she LOVED Uncle Timmy! Little stinker! ;)
My little model...Haylee
Michelle was here for 2 weeks! She's in the Air Force stationed in NM now.
Mel & Kat drinkin' margaritas!
Emma eating...so cute!
Dallin & Hunter in the pool
Michelle and her friend "Maybeline" :)
The Grill Master
Jordan didn't want me to take his picture...still cute.
Lilly
Brian...being Brian ;)
Happy Obi
"Nick Lachey"...or is that Mark?
Obi & DB got along JUST right. :)
Maybe a little TOO well!
Tim & Mel
Dallin jumpin' in
I tried to calm her down by taking our pic...LOL
Tyler...too cool.
The girls!
Nicki & Mel
Melissa & Dad
DB & Mom
He's all dressed up for the 4th!
My mini-mums, aren't they cute?
Watermelon, yum!
Haylee was all dressed up for the 4th too!
Me & my girl
hope everyone had a great 4th of july also! :) thanks for looking at my pictures.
wishin' you a kickin' 4th!
wow can you even believe it's july? and to top it off tomorrow is independence day!! woo hoo! the 4th of july is one of my favorite holidays and i think it is because it reminds me of how FREE we are in this country. i mean, of course there are laws and restrictions and guidelines and constraints, but we are a free country... that is something to ponder and meditate on and actually feel blessed about. of course, our freedom comes with a price...God bless our military and their families. being a veteran myself it really has opened my eyes to what these families go through. it's a tough struggle sometimes and sometimes families are separated for periods of time. i just want to THANK you all...so very much for the sacrifices you make for us and our country and your families. we love you!! i love the 4th because our family gets together and we have so much fun when we all get together. sure, we get loud and crazy and sure sometimes a kid {or two} get hurt {knock on wood for tomorrow...}. but all in all, we all get a long and we love the time shared together. :)
i hope you all have a happy and blessed 4th of july, wherever you are, whatever you do. i will be taking pictures like usual, so look for them either on my blog or facebook. :) be safe! love you all....melissa
wow...that was me?!
so at the end of july my community is having their annual community yard sale. when we first moved into this house last october i thought it would be fun to have my own yard sale because we have a lot of junk i just need to get rid of, but shortly after we moved in i got lazy and decided it was too much work. ;) but now that i got a note on my door the other day saying a local real estate agent in the area is hosting a community yard sale...i figured i might as well throw some things on my lawn...make a few extra bucks. why not!
last night i decided to tackle the garage...whew! it wasn't actually that bad and, as i thought, we have a lot of stuff! mostly old clothes and things of Haylee's that just need to go. i get sad and have separation anxiety when i think of giving away {or selling} my old things because i put too much emotional emphasis on OBJECTS sometimes. as the years go by though, i have learned to just let go. sometimes you just have to, right?
we have these two huge tupperware things FULL of just old memorabilia. i decided to go through it last night {well, one of them anyway} and it was all of this old, FUN stuff...it flooded a lot of memories {good and bad} too...it was almost renewing for me and brought a sense of fulfillment to my soul. it might sound silly, but it was a lot of fun and i have a whole basket to go through tonight. i found things from our wedding like my white silky ballet slippers i wore on my wedding day...i am not {was never} a high heels type of girl. i have heels on at work and i promise you...i am 28 years old and these are only the 2nd pair of heels i have worn in my life. :) i found flowers and champagne glasses...my ring pillow...all of those special little trinkets you keep from your very special day. it was fun...i found my album with a zillion snapshots from our wedding in that box too.
i dug deeper and found things from high school. my photo album i put together {yes, i was into pictures even back then!} of my friends and some little trinkets i kept from my sr. prom, prom pictures {a lot of those...i am going to scan them & put on facebook, hee hee!}, my tassle and pictures from my hs graduation. my year book from 1998 {my grad year}. a THICK folder of poetry i have been writing since i was 12 years old. wow. i will have to filter through those and see what i wrote about back then. :)
a lot of awards and certificates and plaques from my Air Force days. i wish i had somewhere to show those off, they are so cool. my Air Force "year" book with everyone's well wishes handwritten. ahhh i really love looking at things like that. it just reminds you of who you were and really reminds you of who you are today and how you got where you are in life. amazing.
i loved it. here's a picture of me from high school...i think i look the same. ;)
last night i decided to tackle the garage...whew! it wasn't actually that bad and, as i thought, we have a lot of stuff! mostly old clothes and things of Haylee's that just need to go. i get sad and have separation anxiety when i think of giving away {or selling} my old things because i put too much emotional emphasis on OBJECTS sometimes. as the years go by though, i have learned to just let go. sometimes you just have to, right?
we have these two huge tupperware things FULL of just old memorabilia. i decided to go through it last night {well, one of them anyway} and it was all of this old, FUN stuff...it flooded a lot of memories {good and bad} too...it was almost renewing for me and brought a sense of fulfillment to my soul. it might sound silly, but it was a lot of fun and i have a whole basket to go through tonight. i found things from our wedding like my white silky ballet slippers i wore on my wedding day...i am not {was never} a high heels type of girl. i have heels on at work and i promise you...i am 28 years old and these are only the 2nd pair of heels i have worn in my life. :) i found flowers and champagne glasses...my ring pillow...all of those special little trinkets you keep from your very special day. it was fun...i found my album with a zillion snapshots from our wedding in that box too.
i dug deeper and found things from high school. my photo album i put together {yes, i was into pictures even back then!} of my friends and some little trinkets i kept from my sr. prom, prom pictures {a lot of those...i am going to scan them & put on facebook, hee hee!}, my tassle and pictures from my hs graduation. my year book from 1998 {my grad year}. a THICK folder of poetry i have been writing since i was 12 years old. wow. i will have to filter through those and see what i wrote about back then. :)
a lot of awards and certificates and plaques from my Air Force days. i wish i had somewhere to show those off, they are so cool. my Air Force "year" book with everyone's well wishes handwritten. ahhh i really love looking at things like that. it just reminds you of who you were and really reminds you of who you are today and how you got where you are in life. amazing.
i loved it. here's a picture of me from high school...i think i look the same. ;)
thanks for reading. have a great day...xoxo - mel
when in rome...{do a survey?}
Name: melissa
Sex: female
Birth date: november 20, 1979
Location: california
Height: rounding up let's say 5'5"
Eye color: this color blue
Hair color: this color brown
What does your name mean: melissa is greek for honeybee
High school graduation year: 1998
Favorite relatives: tim's grandpa jerry - he is full of wonderful stories from back in the day
Summer memory: playing outside until after dark when i was a kid
Favorite TV shows: too many to name...a few are SYTYCD, House, The Office, Entourage, Desperate Housewives
What's on your mousepad: don't have one
In the car- ac or windows: windows if below 80, otherwise ac
Do you believe in yourself: sure
Favorite game: i like trivial pursuit or charades
Favorite drink: ice water w/lemon or full throttle blue demon
Favorite food: italian
Favorite colors: blue, aquamarine and pink
Favorite sounds: the ocean waves crashing and rain
Favorite smell: chanel cocoa madamoiselle or anything clean
Worst feeling in the World: someone being upset or mad at me
Best feeling in the World: feeling loved and appreciated, someone looking up to you
Favorite thing to do on a weekend: party with friends & family :)
Favorite soundtrack: across the universe
Where do you see yourself in 10 years: working out of my own photography studio, owning my dream home by then, maybe by then i will have 2 kids or be dealing with the icky teenage years with Haylee...ha!
First thought in the morning: what day is this?
Do you get motion sickness: only on cruise boats
Rollercoasters- deadly or exciting: deadly exciting...i don't really like them.
How many rings before you answer the phone: 2
Future son names: Malcom Shabaz Rashad...kidding. i don't know.
Future daughter names: not sure :)
Are you a good friend: i like to think so
Chocolate or Vanilla cake: i like both
What do you drive: nissan sentra...fully loaded baby that's how i roll. ;)
Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: that's weird, no.
If you could meet one person in the World, who would it be: ansel adams :)
What is your zodiac sign: scorpio
What do you wear to bed: pajamas
Do you eat stems of broccoli: yes
If you could have any occupation when you get older, what would it be: i'll give you one guess!
If you could dye your hair one color, what would it be: i would never dye my hair - until i turn gray that is...
If you could have a tattoo, what and where would it be: i have one picked it and it's a butterfly...but not a typical butterfly and it's going on my back somewhere.
Favorite brand of gum: Orbitz - any flavor
What is your favorite quote: i really like Eleanor Roosevelt's quote "no one can make you feel inferior without your consent".
Have you ever been in love: duh
What's on your walls in your room: a wooden cross, a huge picture above my bed of a flower and a huge photo frame with 30+ pictures in it above my tv.
Is the glass half-empty or half-full: depends on the day and my mood. ;)
Pick a song that describes yourself or that you can relate to: Ooooh tough one. there are so many. i will say "somewhere i belong" by linkin park.
Which do you prefer- Cool Ranch or Nacho Cheese Doritos: cool ranch
Favorite flavor Snapple: not a usual drink of mine, but i like the peach tea
Which one, Coke or Pepsi: coke
Which kind of milk is your favorite: non-fat or soy
If you were to kill someone, which method would you use? i'm not that demented OR evil. sorry.
Are you a righty, lefty, or ambidextrous: righty
When you meet a person of the opposite sex, you notice their: eyes & mouth
If you could be one gardening tool, which one would it be: hmmmm...i only know of one gardening tool and i am NOT that....! how about a watering can? ;)
What kind of shoe would you be if you had an option: a comfy ballet flat
What's under your bed: random stuff, i don't even know.
What's the best number in the World: 7?
What is your dream car: one that doesn't cost me an arm and a leg for a gas fill up!
Nickname: oh i have many...mel, mels, melsie, melsi-drama {lisa & jason}, monkey girl {robby}, twin {steph}, gidget {nate & vince}...all i can think of for now.
Bacon Bits Or croutons: bacon bits
Favorite Salad Dressing: italian
Do you Drink: yes
What type of Shampoo/Conditioner: vive for now...smells oh so good
Have you ever been skinny dipping: maybe
Do you make fun of people: sometimes...friends - all of the time
Have you ever been convicted of a crime: no
Best friends online/offline: i have both :)
One pillow or two: two
Pets: one dog...Miley
Favorite Movies: so many...Superbad, Juno, Ironman, Anchorman...anything with Will Ferrel or Adam Sandler or the Wilson bros...I love comedies. i like Across the Universe too...i sometimes like weird movies that other people don't like.
Favorite Movies: so many...Superbad, Juno, Ironman, Anchorman...anything with Will Ferrel or Adam Sandler or the Wilson bros...I love comedies. i like Across the Universe too...i sometimes like weird movies that other people don't like.
Favorite type of music: alternative rock or emo music....some are linkin park, seether, breaking benjamin. i also like some country and some 80's and 90's...i like pretty much all genres.
Hobbies: photography, being creative, arts, hanging out with the fam, doing fun things with my little girl, the beach, family gatherings
Word or Phrase you overuse: right?
Toothpaste: Crest Vivid White
Piercing or tattoos: just two holes in each ear these days...i used to have more but i'm done with piercings. no tattoos yet.
Favorite beer: lovin' the bud light lime
Favorite song at the moment: 'can you fix my h-e-a-r-t cuz it's d-a-m-a-g-e-d...my heart is damaged...thought that i should lettcha know'....and i like 'american boy' i forgot who sings it.
Favorite subject in school: english/literature
Least favorite subject in school: math/science
Most humiliating moment: there are SO many...really! i will just say one that still makes me turn red to this day. i was in basic training and we carried our books with us everywhere...well we were in the mess hall (eating dinner) and everyone has to walk in front of the drill instructors and face them before you sit down. one day my notebook fell right in front of them, they made me open it and one of the DI's read a romantic poem that i had wrote to my boyfriend at the time...ALOUD in front of EVERYONE. i wanted to cry. but i didn't. i was so humiliated.
Craziest or Silliest Person You Know: me...can i say me?
Favorite Holiday: Christmas
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